Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Happy Blogiversary

Head on over to Finding Normal http://debbie61497.blogspot.com/ and wish her a happy 1 year blogiversary. Her blog is one that I read frequently...she inspires me to live each day to the fullest with both of my children....plus her little Addison's red curly hair holds a special place in my heart:). Happy Blogiversary Debbie:). Here's to many many more:).

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Merry Christmas and "the program":)

Merry Christmas to all! What an amazing day! We've come so far, and today was just....RELAXING! I sat in awe looking at my two little miracles who were loving every minute of life today (and so was I). Just a miracle...a blessing!
Photobucket This picture was taken on Sunday...the day that we decorated our tree:)...nothing like waiting until the last minute. Today, we were getting ready to go to my sister's house. Tim had JUST put Owen in the car...and our tree came crashing down in the EXACT spot that Owen was sitting...YIKES!! WOW! Am I ever thankful that he was not still sitting there!

Emma's Christmas program at school was AMAZING! Emma was SO into it, and she actually did every part that she was supposed to do (and a few that she wasn't...but, who cares right? She was cute:)). An elderly gentlemas came up after the program to let us know that Emma was the unsung star in his eyes! He said that he couldn't take his eyes off of her. It was pretty tough....she was just so darned CUTE!!! She was a candy cane:).
I cannot even begin to explain the rush of emotions that went through me while watching Emma on the stage. WOW! She's just come SO far! To think that she is in kindergarten...and living every breath to the fullest! It's incredible really!

And....a few pictures of Owen. Em's going through a stage right now (that I HOPE is brief) of not wanting to look at the camera, so taking cute pics of her is difficult to say the least! So, I've been taking a few more of Owen:).

First time eating ribs....LOVED them!


And, of course, the bath afterward

He does clean up well

And, a little thought to leave you with this beautiful Christmas night.....ALWAYS IMAGINE MIRACLES HAPPENING:)

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Burning Eyes

My eyes are burning...a few too many tears have been shed. However, that is behind me...and I am ready to forge ahead!
This special needs gig is not for the weak
I must give my all
My eyes must not leak:)

Emma will shine in her Christmas program tonight
She will not jump, or turn or hmmmm? sing into the microphone when it is not RIGHT
Her candy cane costume and her hair up in bows
Will be the envy of every mother who sits in the rows

My heart is heavy and pounding
Practice has been off to say to put it best
But onward we go
After the program we will rest

Monday, December 15, 2008

Random Thoughts...and some trivia:)

This time of the year I find myself being very random. With the pandemonium of activities that occur, trying to finish everything that I need to at school, concluding our Christmas production, getting gifts wrapped/made/bought....it's enough to drive a mama insane. BUT, the saving grace is knowing that EVERYONE else is going through it right along with me.

So, today I am going to have a random post. I'm going to start with a picture that I took of Em this summer that I just LOVE. We stayed at the Ronald McDonald house while Em was having some dental surgery done. The Denver RMH is brand new, and right as you walk in the door there is a child's playhouse. I just HAD to have a picture of Miss Em in it...because the word that is on the top is something I do every single day. I imagine life with Emma....it's something that I am so thankful to be able to do:).

The other night Tim and I were doing our favorite pastime....watching TV:). Emma was playing in her play area...when she comes strutting out...no kidding model walk and all, with this tiarra on her head. She kept saying, "See Mama...I pretty". She would turn and flip her hair then walk a little further. Where DOES she get this stuff?? Too cute!

And the last picture is my TRIVIA question of the day!! Who can tell me what is missing from the picture (wink wink:)!

Thursday, December 11, 2008


Sometimes I wish that I could just make my brain fast forward and my heart stop the quickening that I feel at times like these. I am a person that remembers dates. Tomorrow is not a specific date...but a very specific age. Owen will be 7 months and 14 days old tomorrow, and even typing that makes the warm tears begin to flow down my face. I am instantly taken back to the day that Emma was 7 months 14 days old. That was the day that I prayed a new liver would come for my baby whom I was watching slowly die every single day. That was the day that my prayers were answered...the day that the peace took over my entire being as I handed her to the surgeon who wisked her away to save her life.

Why oh why does my heart hurt so much to think that my baby boy will be that exact age tomorrow? I know that things are SO much different this time around...but, I think that may be part of it. I am enjoying having a baby right now...I love every minute of it! And I feel like I missed out on so much of that with Em. Every aspect of that first year with Em is a blur....except for that day. I can tell you the exact time that day that we received "the call". I can tell you what I was wearing, where I was, who was with me, what they were wearing. I remember every single feeling that went through my mind that day. That day was so euphoric! It was the day where our entire community came together to pray for a little 11 lb baby girl that had so much going against her in life...yet there was so much hope...so many prayers...and they worked! Look where she is today...AMAZING!

Emma at 7 months 14 days old...Love you so much Baby Girl!

Owen at 7 months 13 days...Love you so much Baby Boy!

Such different journeys, but the same Mama love that will never fade!

No Doubt About It....

Emma is DEFINITELY my child:) (Like the 72 lbs. that I gained when I was pregnant with her wasn't enough to prove that). My husband made this announcement this morning, "She may be like me in many ways, but she is definitely showing signs of you in her ability to wake up in the morning!". Apparently, he went to wake Emma up this morning and she said, "No, sleep more....wake up Owen!" as she rolled over and covered her head with the blanket:).

True, I'm not a morning person. I'll be the first to admit that! But, Em always has been, so this is TOO funny!

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

I'm Still Here:)

I did survive the sleepover, but I am still recovering from being so tired:). Actually, BOTH of the girls were asleep by 9:30 and slept until 7:30...so, I can't complain much. HOWEVER, the girls could give Mr. Owen a little sleeping lesson...he doesn't seem to think that is very important, and this Mama needs her sleep!

Sorry that I've been absent from the blogging scene. Thanks Michelle for checking on me:). I was waiting to upload my sleepover pictures, but haven't had the time yet.

I HAVE however been crocheting...and if you knew me personally you would realize just how funny that statement is. I am known for my "hot gluing ability" as in...if it can't be hot glued...it can't be fixed. But, our family (meaning my Mom, Dad, Grandparents, all of my cousins, my sister and her whole family....everyone) growing up all had the same stocking. Now, Tim, Emma and I all have the same stocking...that is crocheted. However, in the past 5 years my mom's arthritis has gotten so bad that she can no longer crochet. SO, that leaves the big job to me. Well, I got one side of Owen's stocking done and guess what!!! It is MUCH smaller than the rest of ours???? So, I am going to attempt to stretch it. Wish me luck!

We have our Christmas program coming up at school. Emma will make her Christmas program debut as a candy cane. I guarantee that there will be pictures to follow:).

Friday, December 05, 2008

Milestone Alert!!!!

We have reached a HUGE milestone!! Our first sleepover. Em is having her friend Brindi stay the night as we speak. It's 9:30 and neither girl is asleep yet??? Em's bedtime is usually 7:30. They are both just TOO excited! We made gingerbread houses, watched movies and ate popcorn. Oh, and they played HARD!! I hope they'll be drifing off to dreamland soon. I'll keep you posted!

Thursday, December 04, 2008

More Polar Express

Let's see if my pictures will work now?

Emma with "Holly the elf". I was so proud of her for standing with the elf. (Notice she's holding Montel...our classroom moose. He goes home with a different child each weekend, and he was SO excited to see Santa)

Here's a picture of the train

Here's Em at the North Pole sign (all of the kids in my class wanted to know "why is it brown"...hmmmm?)

And, here's just a cute picture of Owen on his 7 month birthday. Happy 7 months big boy:)

All Aboard.....

The Polar Express!!!

We went to Boise, ID for Thanksgiving. It was very nice to get away...even if it was a 15 hour drive with 2 small children and my mother in law (now you see how I ended up with the previous post:). Actually it really was fun, and included shopping at 4 am on Black Friday...which has to be right up there with one of my favorite days of the year! You can just feel the Christmas Spirit hanging in the air:).

After shopping that day, we all drove to Horseshoe Bend to board the "Polar Express"

It was so exciting! They had caroling, and milk and cookies. We even got to see Santa (although Emma is still not a fan....I'm pretty sure that she will never be at this point). I did at least get a picture of one of my children on Santa's lap

OK...my pictues aren't wanting to work...I'll have to post them later.

Monday, December 01, 2008

Waiting List for those going crazy:)

So, I did it...I called today to see a counselor. I have times that I just need to sort through all of the "issues" (for lack of a better term) that are mulling around in my head. It's tough because I always think that I can handle it all, but sometimes the weight just becomes too much. It helps me to have a person who isn't biased to talk to, cry to, get mad around, you know.....someone who knows that I am crazy and tells me that it's OK.

Well, guess what....there is a WAITING LIST to meet with someone when you are going crazy!! What kind of sense does that make? Then, the lady tells me that if things get worse to give them a call and they will place me higher on the priority list....well, gee thanks!

The gist of it is...I struggle with the thought of others judging me, my parenting, and most of all....my child. Being around people that aren't around her much (i.e. family from this past weekend) makes me realize how much it hurts my heart that she is not understood...and I cannot help her to be understood. I don't mean with communication...I mean with her actions. WHY does she think that it is neccessary to push her cousin anytime that she wants to play with him? I'm not sure, but I KNOW that it's not just her being a brat....she just can't figure it out....and I can't figure her out....and there is no end in sight. It just makes this Mama's mind go to a very dark place....

BUT, apparently it is not dark enough yet....NOPE, I'm still seeing a little light at the end of the tunnel. If it gets any dimmer I'm sure I'll call to up my status in the looney bin:).

Oh, by the way, make sure to read my previous post. Blogger was being goofy and wouldn't post it correctly. Thanks:).