Monday, March 12, 2012

This Girl

This girl that you see is the one that we were told would not walk or talk. This girl is the girl who we were told would not be placed on the transplant list for the liver she so desperately needed because she would not have a "good quality of life". This girl is the girl whose funeral we have planned more than once. This girl....who is this girl? This girl is my child who I love with a fierce protectiveness that empowers me to make decisions for her and stand up to be her voice. She is the rainbow at the end of every rainstorm. She is the one who has overcome every single obstacle that has been thrown at her. This child has made me stronger than I ever knew was possible. As we come upon Emma's 8th liver transplant anniversary the emotions that run through me are difficult to put into words. It always amazes me that it hits me so hard every year. It is like I am reliving it, and even 8 years later I remember every single detail of the 2 months that Emma was listed and transplanted and all that transpired to make that happen....and all that happened afterward. I cannot fathom not having this child here with me today. She is my sidekick through life. She is my shopping buddy, my social butterfly, my sassy little preMadonna, and I love her with all of my heart (well, she does have to share it with her brother:). Next Monday the 19th of March we will celebrate 8 fantastic years with our new liver. We will pray for the family that made the incredibly difficult choice to donate their beautiful daughter's organs in the most difficult time of their lives.

Thursday, February 02, 2012

Multiple Personality Mama

Wow! I can't believe it has been a year since I have posted something to this blog. I imagine not many people reading this, however I feel the need to document some of my feelings, and this is a great release for me.

It's been a great year in so many ways. Emma is in 1st grade this year, and overall she is doing fantastic! Owen is almost 4 and in his 1st year of "pretty" school (pre-school...he calls it pretty school). He loves it, and I will never tire of hearing the stories of his friends and how his day was. Never underestimate the power of speech and communication! Although Emma has a full dialect of speech now, she had none (or virtually none) at Owen's age, and I never got to hear about her pre-school. We feel very fortunate that Owen is attending the same special needs preschool that Emma did. No....Owen does not have special needs, however they accept 2-3 "typical" developing students per year, and Owen is one that was chosen. I value the questions that he comes home and inquires about his classmates. I feel that by giving him truthful answers, I am building a voice for him to help him answer questions when they are asked of his sister. At this point he just knows that she is fabulous and annoying at the same time....she's his sister:). However, the time will come when someone will comment, and I want him to be as prepared as possible.

Days like today make by heart feel like it has been stabbed. Emma's class is making fun of her...the ENTIRE class!! The music teacher came and spoke to me about it, and I feel SO thankful to have teachers that are willing to address these types of issues and not simply overlook it, but it breaks my heart that 1st graders are seeing the difference in her and feel like it is OK to laugh at her and make fun of her. Now, that is my Mama side!! My teacher side knows that these young minds simply need to be educated on the differences of people and why what they are doing is not OK. However, why does it have to start so young? Emma would never hurt anyone. She honestly has the most beautiful soul of anyone that I have ever met. She loves all that she meets, and she has never met someone that she hasn't considered a friend. I think what irks me the most is the fact that she has struggled for every single thing that life has thrown at her....including simple things like learning to sit, crawl, walk, talk. Why can't ONE thing be simple for her....and that would be earning the respect from others. In my opinion she has already EARNED that!!! RESPECT her!!! That's all that I ask!!!

Phew! I feel MUCH better now:). On a better topic...Emma is READING!!! Yeah!!! It brings tears to my eyes every time that she climbs on my lap with a book and begins to read! The power of never giving up!! I cannot express how proud I am of her!!

In is a picture of the Sassy Pants Princess! We cut her hair, and it is adorable (and so much easier). This picture was taken in November and it has already grown a ton! LOVE IT!

If you've made it through this post bless you! Life is what we make of it, and I chose to see the amazing things that happen every day, however there is the occasional moment where the breath is taken from me and it takes awhile to refill my lungs with good air!