Wow!! That is one word that sums up the past week. At times I have felt like I was run over by a truck, thrown in a washing machine during spin cycle, and completely hung out to dry (sometimes all 3 of these....AT THE SAME TIME). It amazes me how one can feel utter anguish one day, and complete joy the next.
Emma had a "procedure" done on Easter morning. This was her 3rd "procedure" to be done...in a week (under sedation and intubation). We were slightly fearfull but reassured by the doctor that, "I have done 120 of these...and I have never had one go bad"....let's just say HE WON'T BE SAYING THOSE WORDS AGAIN!!
We sent Emma off with the nurse that morning..only to be approached by the doctor 20 minutes later. A look of terror on his face that I will never forget as he said, "She did not do well"....immediate reaction was that they lost her! Complete anguish overtook my body as I sobbed and sobbed while the surgeon attempted to console me. They had stabilized her, but it was pretty touch and go...and she was to remain intubated as we took a journey to the PICU.
Thought for that day....that was the worst feeling that I have EVER had!!
The next day they attempted to extubate Emma right as my husband and I walked into the room. I looked at the monitor and saw that her O2 SAT was 37%...NOT GOOD!! Then I made the extreme mistake of looking at my child!!
Thought for the moment...that was the worst thing that I have EVER seen!!
Emma was able to stay off of the ventilator, but it was very scary for a couple of hours!
Today she woke up ready to take on the world! She is almost off of oxygen, and the joy to see her awake and interacting is one that I cannot put into words.
Thought for the day...enjoy every breath that you take...every moment that you live, and really learn to appreciate the WOW moments! Seeing my baby girl smile today was one of those WOW moments!